Social media has been feeling a bit weird lately. Between that founder actively making Twitter worse to Instagram trying to be everything but a photo-sharing app, it feels like well-known platforms are undergoing some sort of shift.
Recently, I’ve been feeling less open to sharing my life on social media. This feels like a tough transition because I’ve been an avid social media user since around 2012.
Right now, I barely share my home, my current location, or my day-to-day activities. The dopamine rush I used to get from the right person seeing my content just felt like it’s faded away to some extent.
As usual, having your privacy threatened is something that usually comes with being a visible woman online. When I spoke to my peers, this was a regular occurrence- from men sending unsolicited nudes to being harassed at their workplaces. People are strange.
Personally, the content online feels a bit repetitive. I still keep up to date with what my friends are sharing, but beyond that? I’m just tired.
A big part of my previous job in media was sharing my work, going to events, and being visible – which I thoroughly enjoyed at the time. But after a while, there was something about maintaining your own personal platform as part of your work that changes the way you want to engage with it. I don’t want to hermit my life away, but I do want to spend more time engaging with my real life. I need to heal from whatever the first four months of this year have been (traumatic).
Social media is also a low-effort way to stay in touch with people (one that I have been guilty of doing too). its’ easy to feel like an Instagram DM is a real form of communication or sending TikToks can substitute an in-person conversation. Participating in people’s lives is how you maintain a friendship and how you build community. Unfortunately, you can’t really view it solely through a snippet of an Instagram story or 15-second TikTok.
However, I just want to spend my time in a more holistic way, reading books or being outside or hanging with friends. Whatever that looks like, I’m just trying my best.
Another phrase that has stuck with me this year: it is safe to be seen trying.
I think this phrase can’t really be blanketed across experiences, but what I gleaned from it is that I can attempt new things and do it proudly. It might mean sharing more of my work on platforms I don’t really use or making time for the hobbies I’ve always had on my list.
This site is one of my projects that feels like it falls under this category. I looked back and I started this site in 2013 and have been updating it regularly since 2014. I don’t make any money off of this, but I don’t want to. I don’t use it to showcase my portfolio or how people can work with me. It’s just a place I can share my thoughts and be seen.
Personally, I don’t have much embarrassment about failure. Like it sucks, but it happens and life moves on. I’d rather be proud of what I tried to do.
Finally, after what my first quarter has been – I went to a psychic and spiritual counsellor last month. I’d been trying to see her for a long time after a friend recommended her, but the timing was never right. Well, it was probably one of the most insightful experiences I’ve had and echoed so many of the thoughts I’d been having. There was a sense of peace after my session and I felt really invigorated to pursue some of my long-kept ideas.
One of the key points she made was that if I have a wait-and-see approach to life, I’m going to keep waiting for the right moment (and it’ll never really come).
The rest of 2023 looks like blocking out distractions, making time for hobbies that feel good for my health, and building routines that improve my overall wellbeing.
If you’ve been feeling the same way, I hope you’ll join me.
I really want to end the year on a better note than what it started. And I’m not afraid to be seen trying to do so.
Cover Image – SKY FERREIRA photographed by Henrik Purienne for Maison Kitsuné spring 2014 collection.
alyx carolus 
I like how you highlighted the importance of prioritizing quality time with loved ones and encouraging one to consider taking breaks from social media to focus on real-life interactions and minimize distractions. I’m sorry to hear that the first quarter of the year was traumatic for you. I genuinely hope that the rest of the year brings you healing, happiness and positive experiences and opportunities for a brighter future.