We were only supposed to be on lockdown until 21 April, but it has been extended once so far until 30 May 2020. Starting from 1 May, Cyril Ramaphosa has put measures into place to slowly ease the restrictions but essentially we’re going to be experiencing some form of lockdown for a while.

Personally, I’ve been taking it one day at a time. I don’t have the energy to bake, try new recipes and have endless Zoom parties. For the most part I’ve been okay with dealing with lockdown, but it feels like I’m in limbo. I’ve said goodbye to the plans I had for the my 30th next year (I wanted to go to Greece with friends). And I’m still trying to find a way to move out of SA as I planned for this year. It might not be as easy, but I am going to try.

It’s a unpredictable time in all our lives and I don’t have the space or energy for a lot of things. I’m lucky enough to still be working quite furiously and I still have clients, which is more than what most have right now. I’ve been keeping busy with a solid routine and unwinding with additional media.

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At least once a day I remember we’re in a whole pandemic. I’ve not been working out regularly or baking or making cool meals. I have been surviving and dealing with how change just happens. Life is just not going to be the way it was and that in itself is sad and scary. Anyways, I’m being honest with myself and how I feel right now bc that’s all I have. Image by @realfunwow

A post shared by 𝐚𝐥𝐲𝐱 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐮𝐬 🇿🇦 (@heyalyx_) on Apr 22, 2020 at 11:25am PDT

I have an ongoing Netflix night with one of my close friends, where we sit and watch some (usually trashy) show together and chat via Whatsapp.

I’ve been listening to podcasts , mainly Thirst Aid Kit, Ghost of a Podcast, Black Girl Brunch and Hello Dysfunction.

Wondering if we've covered your fave or not? Check out the list of all our episodes here: https://t.co/baBkZlUl0a And remember: we love you, but we don't take requests 😉 pic.twitter.com/jHVJmlaczT

— Thirst Aid Kit (@ThirstAidKit) November 4, 2019

I’ve been listening to sound baths (Himalayan singing bowl sessions) before bed to calm down so I sleep better. Another guilty pleasure? I’ve been watching grocery hauls, mainly from the US, because it’s so interesting to see how other people buy and what they’ve got access to.

And I’ve been mourning a life I used to have. I miss being able to go on walks just because I felt like it. I miss being able to leave my house without feeling anxious and having a whole routine when I come back from the shops. I miss going on drives with my friends and visiting markets. I don’t know when I will feel peaceful when I venture outside again.

I don’t really have any answers and quite frankly, none of us do. I hope we can emerge from this with a bit of clarity around what’s important for us (personally) and live a life that feels authentic.

x A