Shame me not

This is probably not that funny – but whatever. Recently, I’ve come across a lot of body-shaming antics in my daily life. Yes, body-shaming, whether you’re making fun of the bigger girl in your gym or the skinny girl that you keep calling anorexic under your breath.

Quite frankly, I’m tired of it. Very very tired of it. Regardless of what your body looks like, whether you are a gym fanatic or couldn’t be bothered to ever get off your couch because lazy – it simply doesn’t give you the right to be a catty individual.

I’ve been told by women who should know better – that I’m faaaaaaar too skinny and how will I ever find a man? (Insert whatever other adjective you know and this is a conversation that 99.99% of women deal with)

Do you have any idea how damaging it is to comment on someone’s body shape without knowing their history with food, body dysmorphia and the like?

A simple comment can start off another ritualized routine of not eating or planning meals or other restrictions.

Another note – mainstream media caters for hardly anyone. Even the models who represent that “ideal look” have their own issues being pitted up against other women/men/humans.

So here’s a list of things I’m really over

1. Having one big ol’ complain about bodies
A lot of people I know – get into these really negative discussions about their bodies. “Oh my ass is too fat/lumpy/ass-like”, “No, have you seen mine?” and so the shitty cycle continues. Now, honestly if you do feel that way – I’d rather hear you talk about the rad things you’re doing to up your self-esteem (whether it’s eating clean or trying tango lessons or kickboxing the shit out of someone). In fact I’d rather just talk about things that make me laugh. Or whatever. (side note: if you suffer from mental health issues – there’s an entirely different process for that)

that’s how I feel when entering a negative body image convo

2. Trying to compete
It’s hard to remember that you’re rad as you are – but the culture of women ‘competing’ makes no sense. No one needs that negativity in their life and neither do you.

really.

3. Mainstream media
Look, magazines are cool (in some cases) but honestly – when last did you see a woman that looked like you? Prolly not never. So until the mainstream media gets with the winning team – find your own goddamn media to read. Curate a selection of people that look like you or inspire you or question the status quo. It certainly helps when crappy media is out of sight and out of mind.

my reaction to mainstream media most of the time.

4. Being shamey aka bullying
*eyerolls into next dimension* I’ve left conversations like this because I honestly do not care about (insert name)’s bum or thighs or flabby arms. Bullying is heinous – actually. And if you haven’t ever experienced it – it leaves a scar on the soul. I don’t condone bullying – let alone grown women being bullies.

Anyways, my rant is over. This is simply my opinion. If you’re not positive about this kind of thing, chances are we aren’t friends and you really don’t have to care.

– A

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